Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

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Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#1

Post by Calamity Panfan » Wed Feb 19, 2020 8:09 am

I think I spam WoT enough with my fast food opinions for it to warrant its own topic. I've cut down on a lot of my fast food eating habits lately, but I'll still eat it a decent amount for convenience's sake/as a treat. And just because I eat it less doesn't mean I don't have very strong opinions about it. So get ready to be bombarded by some objectively correct fast food takes.

First, I wanna talk about something that's not going to be controversial at all! FAST FOOD FRIES, RANKED FROM WORST TO FIRST.

17. Five Guys

I know a lot of people that tell me they love Five Guys. I went to one after seeing the Sonic movie last Friday, because my roommate said he wanted to stop "if not only to grab some fries." This almost made me gag, because Five Guys fries are the worst fast food fries on the planet.

Five Guys fries are the definition of quantity over quality. They do something brilliant at Five Guys. They not only give you the full cup of whatever size you ordered, they throw at least another full scoop of fries right into the bag. They give you so many fries. But their fries are completely soggy and soft. The best French fries are nice and crisp; get your flaccid fries away from me.

16. Sonic

Sonic is also a restaurant where I've never had fries that weren't soggy by the time I ate them. If you eat at Sonic, order tater tots, which are damn near impossible to screw up. Unlike fries. They screwed up their fries.

15. In-N-Out

In-N-Out has very good burgers on the rare occasions I've been in a region of the United States where I've been able to consume them. Their fries have underwhelmed me, though.

14. Wendy's

Wendy's fries are pretty solid if you get them fresh and eat them IMMEDIATELY. But I feel like they get cold faster than any other fries on this list. I only really ever mess with Wendy's fries if I'm also getting a Frosty to dunk them in.

13. Burger King

Both Wendy's and Burger King have changed their fry recipes since I was a kid, and both of them have improved pretty well since then, even if they're still towards the bottom of the food chain. I'd say that Wendy's taste better fresh, but since Burger King's still taste okay by the time you get home, they win.

12. A&W

A&W is maybe the most average fast food fry around. I like them fine, but I'm usually getting curds anyway if I find an A&W that's survived to 2020 so I skip them.

11. KFC

This is probably cheating because KFC has potato wedges, not fries. I think they're fry-like enough. I like the seasoning, and the smaller, crispy wedges really hit the spot. There are too many instances where you get huge wedges and the crispness-to-potato ratio is completely ruined, though.

10. Culver's

The first few Culver's crinkle cut fries are heavenly, but for some reason they don't hook me like other fries on the list. They lose their luster quickly, and I rarely feel like finishing my order. I also think Culver's tends to over-salt, which knocks them down a bit.

9. Chick-Fil-A

Chick-Fil-A's waffle fries have a great taste and I love dunking them into Chick-Fil-A's various sauces, but they're just a teensy too soft. If they were even slightly crispier, they'd be top 5.

8. Hardee's/Carl's Jr.

I used to rank Hardee's in general around Burger King territory in just about everything (so, below average). But I got Hardee's a couple weeks ago before my D&D session and it really hit the spot. I couldn't get enough of the fries in particular. I dunno if this was just a good Hardee's or they've changed their recipe, but these could rise a few spots for me.

7. Shake Shack

A slightly better crinkle cut than Culver's. Shake Shack's fries in my experience tend to be a bit crispier without being thinner, which is a nice feat for a crinkle-cut fry.

6. Taco Bell

Even without the cheese sauce, I really dig Taco Bell's fries for their seasoning. They're way better with the sauce though, especially if you mix a little bit of fire sauce in there. If they were a bit firmer or crispier they'd be in the top 5.

5. Arby's

We're in top tier fry territory. Arby's curly fries are delicious. I like the bit of kick they have to them, and curly fries are just fun in general. You occasionally get a long curly fry that seems a bit under-done, but it's a worthwhile risk.

4. McDonald's

The standard by which all fast food fries are judged. Classic.

3. Steak n Shake

Shoestring fries seem to be controversial since they don't have a ton of potato inside. Steak n Shake's fries in particular might be more like potato straws than French fries. It doesn't matter. They're delicious.

2. Popeye's

Love the cajun fry seasoning on these. Popeye's fries are magic in that they might be the only fries that you can put in the fridge and have them be edible later.

1. Rally's/Checkers

Perfect crispiness. Perfect thickness. Perfect amount of seasoning. I can't think of anything remotely bad to say about these. I wish I could eat them with every meal.

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#2

Post by Marilink » Wed Feb 19, 2020 8:18 am

Good thread

We have different fries priorities so my list is very different (I don’t mind a soft French Fry if it’s well-seasoned)

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#3

Post by Calamity Panfan » Wed Feb 19, 2020 8:29 am

Yeah I love a good seasoned fry but the crunch has gotta be there for me.

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#4

Post by RinkuTheFirst » Wed Feb 19, 2020 10:14 am

Calamity Panfan wrote:
Wed Feb 19, 2020 8:09 am
16. Sonic

Sonic is also a restaurant where I've never had fries that weren't soggy by the time I ate them. If you eat at Sonic, order tater tots, which are damn near impossible to screw up. Unlike fries. They screwed up their fries.
I almost broke up with a girl because she got me french fries instead of tots at Sonic (jk, obviously, but damn the fries at Sonic are awful).

Y'all ever had Jack's (not Jack in the Box) fries? They coat them in a seasoned salt... so delicious. Sometimes they forget the salt and then they're just mid tier at best.

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#5

Post by CaptHayfever » Wed Feb 19, 2020 10:20 am

^Yeah, they're good. They've got curly, too.

I've said it before & I'll say it again: If you're ordering burgers & fries at Sonic, you're missing the point of Sonic, which is all the delicious weird stuff on their menu (including tots).

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#6

Post by X-3 » Wed Feb 19, 2020 11:04 am

Everything you said about Five Guys is true. Too many fries disturbs the balance.

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#7

Post by Calamity Panfan » Wed Feb 19, 2020 11:19 am

^^ I actually like Sonic's burgers, but yeah their appeal is definitely in their other items. Outside of A&W it's the only fast food place where I can really get a coney dog

^ it's clearly overcompensation. when will the sheeple wake up and realize the fries are garbo

Don't have Jack in the Box here, and every time I've been in a region where they have Jack in the Box, I feel like there was also In-n-Out so we did that.

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#8

Post by smol Kat » Wed Feb 19, 2020 11:44 am

Yeah when I get sonic I always go for the onion rings. Those are delish.
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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#9

Post by Booyakasha » Wed Feb 19, 2020 11:54 am

If onion rings are an option, I always get them over regular fries.

My local mall lost its Arby's a few years back. I go to that mall far less often now. Coincidence?

I don't think I've ever gotten wedges at KFC. Why would I, when I could have KFC coleslaw instead. That stuff is the tits, man.
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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#10

Post by Calamity Panfan » Wed Feb 19, 2020 11:56 am

if i'm at kfc ideally i go for the mashed potatoes. they taste fake as **** but it's a very tasty fake

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#11

Post by Booyakasha » Wed Feb 19, 2020 12:14 pm

Pan, my man...let me teach you.



...I mean, you get the mashed potatoes because it comes with the gravy. Then you discard the mash like the chaff it is, and you dunk your chicken directly into the gravy. It's so obvious. The gravy and chicken were meant to be together. Cut out the middle-man, why not.

Then you eat the coleslaw for dessert.

Then maybe you're lucky like me and your local KFC is a block up from your local DQ, so you can have a strawberry cheesequake blizzard for second dessert. Yeah.
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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#12

Post by Apollo the Just » Wed Feb 19, 2020 1:50 pm

taco bell has fries?

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#13

Post by Calamity Panfan » Wed Feb 19, 2020 1:52 pm

Apollo the Just wrote:
Wed Feb 19, 2020 1:50 pm
taco bell has fries?
NACHO fries

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#14

Post by smol Kat » Wed Feb 19, 2020 2:26 pm

Kinda want to try them again; the first time I had them I loved the seasoning but wasn't all that impressed with the potato quality. That said I'm not reeeaaaaally a fries person in general, so.

Also the closest Arbys to me is like 20 minutes away. This is an outraaaaageeeee
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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#15

Post by DarkZero » Wed Feb 19, 2020 7:00 pm

shoestring fries are some of my favorites bc i find the crunch-to-soft ratio ideal, but also the problem is how tempting it is to shove 20 of them into my mouth at once like the Steak n' Shake Gremlin of legend
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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#16

Post by CaptHayfever » Thu Feb 20, 2020 12:40 am

Calamity Panfan wrote:
Wed Feb 19, 2020 11:19 am
Don't have Jack in the Box here, and every time I've been in a region where they have Jack in the Box, I feel like there was also In-n-Out so we did that.
Come visit me. We'll get Jack in the Box.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#17

Post by smol Kat » Thu Feb 20, 2020 12:43 am

I've done Jack in the Box but not In-n-Out. Tacos were meh, but everything else was god tier. (or am I getting them mixed up, now I don't remember...)
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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#18

Post by Calamity Panfan » Thu Feb 20, 2020 12:51 am

everything about jack in the box seems specifically catered towards people who are drunk or high so i really respect the hell out of them

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#19

Post by CaptHayfever » Thu Feb 20, 2020 12:54 am

^^You come visit me too. (Jack tacos are a fickle beast.)

^The Munchie Meal is actually delightful for people who eat lunch at a normal time but then work late.

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Re: Panny's Correct Fast Food Opinions Thread

#20

Post by DarkZero » Thu Feb 20, 2020 12:57 am

maybe its just bc we dont have either where i live but i get those two mixed up all the time. i feel like they should just consolidate into one restaurant.

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