31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#21

Post by Apiary Tazy » Sat Dec 07, 2019 8:28 am

Day 7: Maria Giuseppa Rossello

Born in Albissola Marina in 1811, Bernadetta Rossello was the forth of ten children. She did her best to assist her parents whenever she could and was devoted to the Virgin Mary. As such, she became a member of the Third Order of Saint Francis at the age of sixteen. When her parents passed on she was left to care for the household, and her endless kindness helped when she became a teacher and treasurer for the groups conservatory. From her religious training she changed her name to Maria Giuseppa Rossello and created the new institute "Daughters of Our Lady of Mercy" acting as Superior General for forty years. Eventually, she would pass on from heart complications on December 7th 1904. Her current place of burial was approved by Pope Pius X five days afterwards

Let us begin this feast with...

Painkiller

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Perfect For:
- If you're still playing games like Doom.
- Your uncle who insists the John Constantine is still cool and gets pouty when his wife keeps mistaking him for Johnny Mnemonic
- Passing the time in Purgatory

What You Need: Computers Only.

Sometimes you just need something that's really stupid. Forget high art, that's for stuffy losers that are insecure. Forget children's games, children have snot for brains. Oh forget realism, if I wanted an accurate representation of people dying, I'd join the Marines! I'm going into hell to kill hordes of demons with my ridiculous stake gun. Be back in five.

After a fatal car crash, Daniel and Catherine Garner are taken to the afterlife, however while the latter goes to heaven, Daniel gets put into purgatory because he caused the crash or something. One day, Samael shows up and tells Daniel that if he wants to get out of here he has to kill some of Lucifer's generals with the goal being to stop a war between heaven and hell. By the way, Purgatory isn't that nice of a place right now, so get your guns and fight for everlasting salvation! Painkiller, gameplay wise, centers on killing hordes of demons in various closed and open areas. Naturally, you get a variety of powerful weapons that center on resource management which also includes your health. On top of each objective, each level has a bonus objective that will grant you a tarot card upon completion, said card giving a temporary boost when used in game. There's multiplayer if you can get some friends to buy the game with you. Plus, given the bonus ending on the highest difficulty and multiple expansion packs you can get at your own pace, this one is all about replaying until you're a master at every trick it has. Do you have the guts to persevere?

Meanwhile, this one gets thrown away.

Too Human

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Not For:
- Anyone that has confided a love of Warhammer 40k Space Marine to you
- Thor Fans
- If you've ever looked at the right stick on your controller and thought that it'd be a nice way to control the camera in games.

What Runs It: Xbox 360

Death is inevitable. Nothing lasts forever, not even that fruitcake you've left in the fridge. Someday it will break down into its base components and become compost that could one day make a tree. However, bad decisions can speed up ones demise. Choices like stealing a game engine, leaving a developer that gave you a surprising amount of control for someone else, taking too long to make a video game. This is the story of Silicon Knights and X-Men Destin- I MEAN TOO HUMAN! Phew. Dodged that bullet.

With humanity on the brink of extinction thanks to a war between man and machne, they turn to the Aesir and the Organically Distributed Intelligence Network to ensure their survival. They get Baldur in return, so most of the game is spent being given boring narration made to set up a trilogy. In between these cutscenes is a series of mobs you're made to cleave through, either with your sword or some guns by using a series of archetypes. Having removed its multiplayer, there is now far too many enemies to deal with without taking damage constantly. Eventually, you'll die and that leads to one of the longest death animations you'll ever see with an angel picking him up from the ground and taking him away. A little melodramatic for a god that's supposed to be immune to everything but mistletoe. What generally happens is that once you get over the unique aesthetic, this game is forgettable for everything except for how frustrating it is, which is exactly why it's been forgotten. Probably also why Dennis Dyack hasn't been able to get a game off the ground ever since. Ten years is a perfectly normal game dev time, right?

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#22

Post by Apiary Tazy » Sun Dec 08, 2019 7:35 am

Day 8: Eutychian

Not much is known about this pope from the 3rd century. However, he had an epitaph from the Crypt of the Popes. He reign varies from eight years to ten months. Some evidence suggests that he allowed the blessing of grapes and beans and also buried more than three hundred martyrs: A tough task as it is also believed that there was no persecution of Christians at this time and field blessing is said to come from a later period. However his actions undoubtedly helped the Catholic Church become an important institution for the Roman Empire long after his death in 283 A.D. so he has that going for him

Let us begin this feast with...

Grow Home and Grow Up

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Perfect For:
- If you've ever played Getting Over It with Bennett Foddy, got mad, and want something easier than that.
- Anyone who watches Wall-E once a year at least.
- Your cousin who is not afraid of heights at all.

What You Need: Computer and PS4, while Grow Up is also on the Xbone

Sometimes a task takes time, and it takes multiple steps. If you want something done, you not only gotta do it yourself, but see it through to the end. That is if you want to ensure a project's success. This is especially true for gardening as you have to account for so many factors and situations that you may not even know how how succeeded. Luckily, video games are so much more simple. Otherwise these games about vine climbing would be so much more difficult!

BUD is in a pickle and whether it's to get home or find pieces of his ship he can accomplish this task by growing a large vine. BUD can also climb which is very useful for getting up the vine. Naturally, you will need to do so in order to find shoots that extend the length of your vine and ultimately get to reach your destination. On top of this you can find a number of power up crystals that give you even more abilities for vine following even beyond the end point of said game. Both games are technically pretty short, but for someone with nothing better to do than play one game and then another, Grow Home and Grow Up are certainly worth one's time. Just... grow with the flow. :)

Bad game, Bad game, go away.

Pac-Man 2600

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Not For:
- Friends diagnosed with Pac-Man Fever
- Your nephew who watched that show about Pac-man literally facing someone named "Betrayus"
- If you enjoy being able to see.

What Runs It: Nothing. You can put it in an Atari 2600 if you want and something will happen, I suppose

Ha! You thought E.T. was going to be here, didn't you? Well, funnily enough, E.T. is still a video game. It's a video game that is far too complicated and hard to parse for the time and its mechanics are all made to kick you in the face, but that's still a video game. Also Custard's Revenge is also a video game, regardless of it's subj An alpha released for full price, however, is never a video game. It's an exercise in whatever happens when you glare at the screen playing Pac-Man for the Atari 2600.

You've played Pac-Man, right? Well this is Pac-Man. Get all the pills, avoid ghosts, use power pellets to be invulnerable. Not hard to mess up, right? Well, the Atari 2600 is not the arcade, actually it's probably inferior to your alarm clock, but that's not an excuse. It's actually a beta that was released by Atari rather than refined upon like its creator wanted. Even with an inferior port, it shouldn't have been too awful but it's ugly, it blinks constantly and its hard to control by comparison to any other port. It was obsolete out of the box, and it didn't need to be so... yeah. Stop being so yeah this instant, young man.

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#23

Post by Apiary Tazy » Mon Dec 09, 2019 3:44 am

Day 9: Juan Diego

Born in Cuauhtitlan in 1474, he was purely within his country's middle class, but he was respectful and gracious to those around him. He had been baptized by Franciscan missionaries and although he had a wife, the two lived in celibacy. He had allegedly healed a man who fell from a roof in a suicide attempt at the behest of his mother. After a coma that lasted a few months the man wound up recovering to the surprise of many doctors at the time. While he died in 1548, his popularity came around in 1974 by many asking for him to be canonized. In 1984, an inquiry was made by Cardinal Ernesto Corripo Ahumada and by 1990, Pope John Paul II officially made Juan Diego a saint.

Let us begin this feast with...

Return of the Obra Dinn

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Perfect For:
- Someone that loves a good mystery.
- Your dad who was possibly a sailor at some point.
- If you're colorblind.

What You Need: Computer, Xbone, PS4, and Switch

There's always a job that needs to be done. Streets need to be sweeped, traffic lights need to be recalibrated, your phone needs to be updated... if you can think of something, chances are there is someone working behind that thing. This, of course, includes death and that is specifically what you get called upon to look over in this game. From the makers of Papers Please! Really. I mean that.

After six years of sailing aimlessly, the Obra Dinn appears into the eyes of the East India company with no crew and damaged sails. As an insurance adjuster, you are brought onto the ship in order to find out what happened and get the captain's logbook. However, you also have a leg up: A time piece that was given to you in a box. As you explore, there are times where you'll show off that time piece and if you use it you'll be sent back in time to the last second of someone's life. From here you can look around at the various people here and there as you piece together the puzzle of what happened on this ship and put everything into order. The game loop is therefore about remembering everyone on the crew and following their paths around the ship as you write down their ultimate fates. You can, of course, bumble through everything but to get the best ending, you may have to keep a notebook with you to put it all in order. But most importantly, it's assured that you'll be perplexed by what happened on this long lost ship long after you leave it.


Take the trash out, and take this with it.

Exit 19

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Not For:
- If you enjoy fulfilling Walking Simulators.
- Theater Kids (Oh god no)
- Narcoleptics.


What Runs It: A computer runs it just fine.

The Vanishing of Ethan Carter. What Remains of Edith Finch. That Dragon, Cancer. All these games show that in some respect you don't need to follow the usual game conventions to make something that draws people in. Walking Simulators are a way to more easily put together a narrative with minimal gameplay. In the best cases, they manage to enhance a world by giving more to those that pay attention or look around. In the worst cases you get Exit 19 which I'll explain why in the next paragraph.

You are in a desert with a car seemingly out of gas. With fuzzy vision you then walk around as the screen occasionally goes to black and narrates random sentences at you. It's twenty minutes, sure. Bad short games made for free are all over the place. But it's the worst case scenarios for video games, you do absolutely nothing but walk around as things happen to you. It's peak laziness with an attempt to seem deep but in reality you'll probably forget about it in seconds. Dear Escher is like this to a lesser extent, but at least the intention in that game is to explore an actual island. Here you get to run around a desert with some objects placed in it and you have to visit everything. There's no unique exploration, no interaction, one level, you jump into a grave for no reason... You'll come away with games like these with nothing. You might as well stare at a wall.

The End.

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#24

Post by Apiary Tazy » Tue Dec 10, 2019 6:57 am

Day 10: Thomas Merton

Born in Prades, Pyrenees-Orientales, France on January 31, 1915 to two artists, Merton was baptized in the Church of England under his father's wishes. He was enrolled into a boarding school, where at first he showed no interest in the religious pursuits. However, with the help of a Catholic couple he found that he came to understand that since he believed in nothing, whatever he said about belief would in itself be empty. He spent much of his time as an Agnostic until 1933 which is when he came across a mural of Jesus in the Santi Cosma e Damiano after which he had found his faith as a Trappist. He eventually went to America and among many things he became a writer with more than 50 books to his name managing to pull in people from around the world to read what had released, He also maintained some level of activism up to to late 60's. On December 10, 1968, Merton was found dead with a short circuited fan on top of him in Bangkok, Thailand. It was declared he died from heart failure thanks to an accidental electricution however some believe to this day that it was a CIA assassination.

Let us begin this feast with...

1bitheart

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Perfect For:
- If the Social Link parts of Persona are your jam
- Your cousin that wants more Phoenix Wright and doesn't mind something only a little similar
- When yesterday is not today, let the memories fade away, gotta keep keep moving on, I've had the power all along.

What You Need: A Computer

Everyone has a personal style they call their own, something that is wholly them. What inspires that style and how much that inspiration encompasses it can vary but usually you are your own person and no one can be that for you. But the point I'm getting at is that usually smaller games are usually unique in a way bigger games can't be. Something like Undertale, for example. This extends beyond art, and music and continues on towards gameplay, hitting themes that are usually passed over in most stories. That is, in a way, what 1bitheart is, a game built in the shadows on simple foundations.

You control a boy named Nanashi Yoshi, someone who's about as weird as the rest of the cast here. In a world where everyone is microchipped, he's taken to be a shut-in. One day, a girl with amnesia is found on her bed with the name Misane and little else. Realizing that Nanashi has no self-esteem she decides that while she's looking for clues to who she is, Misane will help Nanashi get some friends. That is ultimately what the game centers around: Friendship and how to get it. Usually this is done through finding topics via various subjects and using them in discussions. Improper use will result in a loss of "mental health", so its all about finding the right time to do a certain action or bring up the right topic. It's a lot rougher in practice than most games of this type, but it still hits that same genre well enough to be worth attention. If you're ready to converse than it's the sort of game for you.

Take this out with the trash, in the meantime...

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

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Not For:
- If clear and concise rules for a video game is essential for a good gaming experience.
- Anyone that loves the book
- Doctors looking to confine their evil side with a potion of some kind.

What Runs It: Well, an NES will do it.

For the best experience, play this song while reading.

A little obvious, this one, but it is important to note the importance of learning through gameplay. There was a time where the manual of any video game would be required reading before popping the game in but over time we've decided that the best experience is done through the game itself. So what separates a game like Legend of Zelda from a convoluted ugly mess? Turns out that difference is success in the industry and not going out of business. Who knew?

Jekyll is going to his wedding but unfortunately he lives in some hell town where everything annoys him. As the only person in town that's not a piece of trash, he has to walk to the church avoiding literally everything. Cats and dogs, kids, bombers, women fighting, someone singing, little brats, his own evil side. You don't have health, but instead the meter as all about your sanity. When it runs down, Jekyll falls down and become Hyde who slowly walks to Jekyll's position in some mirror mode world. It's your job, therefore, to wake yourself by grabbing things on the screen as you get a game over the moment the two touch each other. Doesn't seem too bad? Well, if you don't have a guide this is literally unexplained and impossible to find out without it. Here's another thing: You can bribe the towsfolk with coins to knock that off, but there's so much nonsense at every second that it only gives you a second of peace technically. It's only worth the trouble to see just how crazy the game acts to kill you. Otherwise you're better off serving your blood pre-

WOOF

WOOF

MYER

WOOF

MYER

MYER

MYER

WOOF

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#25

Post by CaptHayfever » Tue Dec 10, 2019 3:42 pm

How about this song instead?

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#26

Post by Apiary Tazy » Wed Dec 11, 2019 5:32 am

Possibly.

Day 11: Saint Cian

A Welsh soldier, he came to be the servant of Saint Peris, who was a supposed Cardinal of Rome that kept two fish in a well that he drank from daily. Cian eventually retired as a hermit to Caernarfonshire, Wales. He has a church dedicated to him in Llangian, Gwynedd.

Let us begin this feast with...

Into the Breach

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Perfect For:
- Ex-fans of Disgaea that want more difficulty than mass leveling in their strategy games.
- A friend that loves Starship Troopers (understanding of its themes is optional)
- Time Travelers?

What You Need: Computers and the Switch

Time travel is always a hard thing to pull off in stories. Mostly because it's used more or less as a scapegoat to excuse a lot of plot contrivances, but also because its existence is seen as a way to raise stakes lazily, but that does not mean that all time travel media is bad. Obviously. You don't need me to tell you that, do I? ...Shoot. Hold on, I can fix this. Just let me get in my time machine.

Earth is being invaded by bugs creatures known as the Vek. They're large and they want nothing more than to be in charge. But you have giant mechs, so you'd rather not and with that a dispute must begin. You have two islands that need protecting in order to gain power that can be used against the invading force. Lose on a single map here and its all over and it's not just your demise that triggers it. The Vek are going after facilities and losing those will risk your power grid. Luckily, you have quite a few things in your favor. Beyond finding powerful weapons of course. First of all is that the Vek telegraph all their attack and they will attack no matter what. This means that with some moves you can push them away from their target so they hit nothing or even another Vek. Mitigating damage in each stage is key as a result. But, whether you succeed or fail, you must send someone into the past in order to get a fighting force made against the Vek in the past and start all over again. Given its rougelike elements, it's not easy at all, but what it offers is unique enough that even if you despise Rougelike games, it might be enough that it's worth giving a shot.

Meanwhile, this gets left behind...

Haze

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Not For:
- Halo, Call of Duty, or Killzone fans.
- Your grandpa who loves Apocolypse Now.
- If you've recently overdosed on honey.

What Runs It: PS3 EXCLUSIVE!!!

Drugs are hard to use as a writing concept. Mostly because most people don't do hard drugs enough to figure out how it feels to be on them, while people who have used hard drugs don't tend to write that often. It's a dire state of affairs when a comic book showing Red Arrow getting hooked on cocaine then killing a bunch of people for a baby doll he believes to be his daughter was given an award for how it depicted drug use, I.E. cartoonishly negative. So made up drugs gotta be worse, right? Well, that's the least of Haze's problems... No it's not.

In the future, one corporation beat the rest. It's not Disney, turns out it was a come from behind group named Mantel that used the drug Nectar to do it. Giving soldiers the ability to be better at everything while making them less cognizant of their surroundings made for a perfect soldier with no PTSD. So Mantel sends some of its military force, which includes our protagonist Shane Carpenter, against a group of rebels known as "The Promise Hand". What does this translate to, though? Well, it makes a bunch of interesting ideas then plops them into a mediocre video game, so much so that when the rather obvious turn to the Promise Hand takes place, the Nectar soldiers just start acting like them and not super enhanced power soldiers. In the end, it's really more of an awful game because it's what killed its developers Free Radical. They were bought out by Crytek shortly thereafter as their attempt to make a new game on the PS3 failed. So the lesson is never work for AAA Publishers because they will steal your organs and leave you in a tub of ice. Whether or not you live doesn't matter to them really.

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#27

Post by Apiary Tazy » Thu Dec 12, 2019 5:55 am

Day 12: Finnian of Clonard

Finnian, born in the Irish based Kingdom of Lienster and son of Findlog. He was a member of the ancient tribe Clanna Rudhraighe and was baptized by Saint Abban. From there he was placed under Bishop Fortchern of Trim's care then studied at the Martin of Tours in Gaul and the Monastery of Cadoc the Wise. It's believed he stayed here for thirty years before returning to Ireland where he started a community at the Skellig Michael but eventually came to live in Clonard, County Meath as an angel had told him to do so. His fame as someone who dedicated his life to the faith brought scholars from all over to his retreat turned monastery which was quite strict in its principles in overcoming the eight great evil tendancies and had around three thousand pupils at any given time. Finnian died of the plague in 549 and after attacks by multiple groups the school was lost to time.

Let us begin this feast with...

Clive Barker's Undying

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Perfect For:
- If a more basic Eternal Darkness sounds great.
- Horror Fans.
- The Irish

What You Need: Computers.

So, remember Clive Barker? The creator of Hellraiser, produced Gods and Monsters? Had his name attached to Jericho? Well, it's quite obvious, but you don't ALWAYS get tied to bad things. Well, I mean, you can but you have to be really unlucky/really bad for that to occur. Luckily, Clive Barker hit that good spot at least once with this classic. Well, if you like first person shooters it did but you probably don't hate those.

Our story centers upon one Patrick Galloway, an exile from Ireland who had gained knowledge of the occult during World War 1 along with a cool stone. In 1923 he receives a letter from his commanding officer during the war, Jeremiah Covenant who has had his entire family cursed. Patrick, having not read the letter when it first arrived, makes haste and quickly learns that this curse has turned Jeremiah's dead siblings against him. Bedridden, he begs Galloway to help him. So it's first person shooter time! You naturally have a bunch of weapons both long and short range made to keep you alive. However, Galloway also has a series of spells that runs on slowly regenerating mana and he collects more spells throughout the game. As with many games of the era, the difficulty comes from both combat and puzzles which you will have to scry in order to see hints and the like. It's certainly an old game, unyielding and ruthless at times, but persevering will reward you with an experience of excellence from that era of the industry and that's irreplaceable.

No bad games allowed in the clubhouse...

Order 1886

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Not For:
- Someone that enjoys playing video games at all.
- Anyone with an interest in Steampunk styled stories
- The Knights of the Round Table who dance when ere they're able.

What Runs It: The Playstation 4

Why watch a video game? Why listen to a movie? Why read a song? For what purpose would you have to purchase something then decide you want nothing to do with the core experience without even considering its contents? It's a real mystery but for some reason its one with a following looking to hide behind any reason to have it their way. Regardless, a game should be considered in its entirety. If that means some people are unable to get into video games, that's fine. Not everyone has to like what I like. But games are allowed to also experiment and be avant garde. They're also allowed to be bad if they want. I am not the game police. There are also no game pol- Wait, that's the ESRB! Where are they!? POLICE!!

In a world with half breed monsters and anti-government insurgency, an alternate history 1886 London calls on the Order of Knights, a group of fighters with the healing power of Blackwater, use the industrial revolution, and names matching the Knights of the Round Table to fight back against them. As Sir Galahad, it is your job to deal with all this while being a curmudeony cliche old man with a group of other somewhat cliche fighters. Most of the game acts on its story, more or less dragging you along kicking and screaming from cutscene to cutscene. I don't mean they drag you along so much as you drag it along as it wants to go at a pace it decides. Gameplay is severely segmented to the point that you may never really feel like you're in danger except for maybe one stealth segment or quick time event here or there. You can let the game play for you, but then by that point you spent sixty plus dollars on a movie which is utterly ridiculous. Especially since as a plot, once you get over the little novel bits in it, is uninteresting and full of cliche dialogue. So as a game it doesn't work but it also doesn't work as a movie. Ultimately this means its fate is to be in a bargain bin, bought by people that have loose change and an afternoon to spend on it. I don't know how "Order 1886 and chill" would really go though. Maybe some people are turned on by the same werewolf boss fight.

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#28

Post by Apiary Tazy » Fri Dec 13, 2019 3:07 am

Day 13: Saint Judoc

Judoc, Joyce, or Josse was the son of the Brittany king Juthael, and brother to Saints Judacael and Winnoc. Judoc renounced his inheritance and went to Rome, during which he was ordained as a priest and became a hermit in Ponthieu, Saint Josse sur Mer, France. Here he stayed until his death in 668 AD though his body was said to continue growing his hair long after his death. Of his relics the Shroud of Saint Judoc, which was used to hold his remains, currently resides in the Louvre.

Let us begin this feast with...

Cubivore: Survival of the Fittest

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Perfect For:
- If you played Tokyo Jungle and want something similar to it.
- Arteurs that enjoy the avant garde.
- Meat Eaters

What You Need: A Gamecube.

Hunting is a sport that excites as many as it frightens. One gets to eat and the other gets to die, and the circle of life continues on. It's not pretty, but I'm certain that you eating a burger isn't pretty either. But that's not hunting either, is it? What if we had a more cutesy representation of murder? That'd be- Okay, it probably won't be much better but it'll pass the ESRB's rating system.

In a world of Wilderness, all the Colorless Beasts proceeded to take all this wilderness for themselves. Eventually the world itself will fade but from this the Wild Cubivore is born to eat Raw Meat and gain color for itself. That is the main gameplay loop, hunting other Cubivores for meat which is used to mutate into a more capable hunter. How do you get meat? Why, by pulling limbs off of other Cubivores of course. You bite, you yank, and eventually the piece is yours to devour! Just be careful because the same thing can easily happen to you. In order to prevent this, you will have to block, jump, or run and the like to avoid someone attacking. On top of mutations dependent on the type of meat you devour, you can also mate as doing so will give you more limbs to fight bigger bosses. You just need to find a love tunnel and pick a mate to produce offspring, provided that you have enough hearts gained over that cycle. Then you need only go out and do it all again. I'm not gonna mince words, Cubivore is hard to find, and given how the disk was made, it's actually more brittle than other gamecube disks, but if you can find it or get to play it... well be reasonable but don't hesitate to give it a shot. Be careful when spending over a hundred dollars on video games, kids.

Meanwhile, don't pay attention to this one... Even though I'm doing exactly that.

Fallout 76

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Not For:
- Fallout Fans
- Fulfilling those Post-Apocolypse indulgences.
- People that hate being lied to.

What Runs It: PC, PS4, and Xbone. They're not the problem in this equation

Truth. Lies. Embellishments, and personal opinions. It's hard to know what really happens in any given moment. Even with all the tools at our disposal in this modern age, it's not easy to figure everything out. There was actually a time when an MMORPG of a franchise would be all anyone would ask for. Pokemon, Zelda, Starcraft. The sky would be the limit and the money from it would flow like a waterfall. Good thing Fallout 76 wasn't being made by a developer that never learns its lessons or improves itself right?

Fallout 76 chronicles the day that Vault 76 opens and with the permission of their overseer the denizens emerge from their hiding place into a nuked wasteland full of enemies with the expectation that they'll restore society. Then you go outside and gather resources, fight botflies, and examine corpses with a bunch of other people. It's not necessarily the most appealing but for people that like this sort of thing, it's still fine. Except, no, because it is filled with nothing but endless problems. It's heavily restricted for monetization, and unlike a lot of games this one forces your microphone on so everyone can hear you. PVP can only be started through a series of warning shots in a baffling move that just makes whoever shoots first be at a disadvantage no matter what. Everything around this game has been an utter disaster, and the recent attempts to squeeze more money out of it only hurts the attempt to salvage what was left of it. Worse than Elder Scrolls Online in just about every fashion. It even stole Skyrim's Dragons. That's just low, dude.

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#29

Post by Booyakasha » Fri Dec 13, 2019 12:36 pm

'Cubivore' is so weird and cool. Allow me to second Tazy's recommendation.
boo--------------de dirigiblez in flames, everyboddyz dead, and he lost his hat

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#30

Post by steeze » Fri Dec 13, 2019 1:58 pm

Apiary Tazy wrote:
Fri Dec 13, 2019 3:07 am

Not For:
- Fallout Fans
- Fulfilling those Post-Apocolypse indulgences.
- People that hate being lied to.
Audible laughter on this end.

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#31

Post by Apiary Tazy » Sat Dec 14, 2019 6:30 am

Day 14: Saint Spyridon

Born on the island of Cyprus in the village of Assia, Syridon worked as a Shepard known for his religious devotion. He married and had a daughter but upon his wife's death, he took his daughter to a convent then joined a monastery. He became the Bishop of Trimythous in the district of Larnaca and took part in the First Council of Nicaea where he countered the arguments of the Presbyter priest Arius and his followers. According to some legends, he converted a pagan by using a pot shard to explain how it was made from fire, water, and clay much like how the Christian doctrine is made of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Then the shard turned to fire, water and, dust before him. After the council, he would eventually fall into disfavor with the emperor Maximinus who started one of the last Christian persecutions, but managed to die peacefully of old age in 348 A.D. His body was moved around due to war until it, along with his relics, came to reside at the Saint Spyridon Church in Corfu, Greece.

Let us begin this feast with...

Meteos

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Perfect For
- If Tetris Attack and screen clears excite you.
- Lovers of Minimalist Art
- If you've ever wanted to blow up a planet.

What You Need: A Nintendo DS.

The want for destruction is inherent within every living being. Don't lie. You like blowing up things too. Right? Right!? Well, puzzle games are a surprising substitute with flashy lights, sounds, and colors. Of course, a game about rocks flying out of the atmosphere is always going to be cool no matter what, so it's really just icing on that cake.

Suddenly, the planet Meteos appears and begins sending junk blocks to as many planets as there are in the universe, slowly bringing them all to their demise. However, some planets succeed in offsetting this garbage by matching colors and subsequently sending it all back where it came from. Working together, these groups create the Metamo Ark from that same garbage-y ore and begin traveling towards Meteos to save their galaxy. Meteos the game has a series of planets to choose from, each with a unique species, planet, music genre, and subsequently a different set of physics for each. Some are reasonable, while others make absolutely no sense to anyone, but are still fun to mess around in use. There's a host of modes, power-ups, planets, and endings to go through before you can really say that you're done with the game and even then it's unlikely you'll put it down for a while after. It's unfortunate that this is most likely the best way to experience this franchise with all other versions being digital games that have been discontinued or on the XBox Live Arcade. So if you find this and it interests you by all means grab a hold of it as you won't regret the action.

Meanwhile, this is leaving the stage...

Bubsy in Fractured Furry Tales

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Not For:
- The Sonic Fandom (LEAVE THEM ALONE!!)
- Children that enjoy fairy tales.
- The Brothers Grimm and/or any of your local comedians

What Runs It: Actually, that's a good point. Does anyone have a working Atari Jaguar that hasn't been permanently fused to one of the few good games released for it?

Oh, Bubsy. Bubsy, OH. I could put any of the games he's appeared in on this list and be justified. Hell, I could put his entire franchise here and be justified. However, I'm not gonna do that. Bubsy 1 is interesting in how its a game with several ideas all fighting each other as you play. Bubsy 2 is more generic than bad, Bubsy 3d is just hilariously awful so I can't do that and the new Bubsy games practice the cardinal sin of being generic and that's it. But few people know of Fractured Furry Tales. This one's different. Very. VERY. D I F F E R E N T.

The world of fairy tales was altered because of Hansel and Gretel kidnapping Mother Goose, I guess because they're sick of being eaten by a witch. As a result, monsters appear in the storybooks and everything's a mess. Bubsy is therefore responsible for some reason and he's off to stop them. I guess he just wants a paycheck? So, yeah, the game is bad. Shocker. But it's probably worse than the other games in its franchise which is much like setting a limbo bar up to a second floor building height and still managing to hit it as you pass under. Levels are too large for a character with a one hit kill health system and set amount of lives. It also commits the crime of copy pasting its set pieces over and over to make it longer and as for how it plays, it's as bad as the first Bubsy game in that running is bad, and the best way to play is to jump around and use the camera to avoid enemies coming to slap those bobcat ass cheeks. Whatever potential Bubsy had is wasted here on a completely different developer, perhaps all the proof in the world that Bubsy was doomed in his era. There may be hope for him in the present, but let's be honest the moment the bad game meme washes off it, Bubsy has little going for himself aside from a mouth. But, well, you never know. It could happen one day. I'll wait.

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#32

Post by smol Kat » Sat Dec 14, 2019 12:26 pm

...furry tales. tehe.
looking up into pure sunlight

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#33

Post by I REALLY HATE POKEMON! » Sat Dec 14, 2019 7:02 pm

Laughing at that dumb pun, are you fur real?

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#34

Post by Apiary Tazy » Sun Dec 15, 2019 2:23 am




Day 15: Maria Crocfissa di Rosa

Paola Francesca Di Rosa was born in the year of 1813 in Brascia to rich industrialist Clemente Di Rosa and Countess Camilla Albani. Educated by the Visitation Sisters in Brascia, she left after the death of her mother to join her father's spinning mill in Acquafredda. Here she noticed the working conditions and at nineteen she became manager, caring for the female workers and looking after both physical and spiritual needs. Her father tried to find suitors for her in return for her skills but she instead had a priest tell him that she had no need of it, dedicating herself to social work. In 1836, during a cholera epidemic, Di Rosa did her best to help the sick, directing a home for the mute and deaf, and making her own congregation named "Ancelle Della Carita", getting her religious name in the process. She would die in 1855 after a fight with prolonged illness and was canonized the year before by Pope Pius XII. She has been quoted as saying "I suffer from seeing suffering"

Let us begin this feast with...

Pokken Tournament DX

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Perfect For:
- Remembering you liked Tekken at one point but also Pokemon.
- Your brother that watches a lot of MMA?
- Whoever runs Jimmy's Famous Seafood

What You Need: Nintendo Switch

Sometimes collaborations can create crazy combinations you'd have never thought of in a million years. Everyone was surprised by Mario x Rabbids being a pretty good strategy game, and who didn't cheer every time Robocop, Terminator, Predator, or Aliens got together at one point or another? ...Anyway, you wouldn't think Pokemon and Tekken teaming up would work out, did you? Well, surprise! It did pretty well.

In the region of Ferrum, Pokemon battles work very differently. You usually stick with one Pokemon and synergize with them to bring out their full potential. Shortly after you arrive in the region you meet up with this woman named Nia who proceeds to follow you around and be your voicebox for the story mode, or the announcer for your fights, or whatever you want her to do so long as it involves not shutting up. Your job is to be the best fighter in all of Ferrum through leagues and the like which is done through the aforementioned one on one fights. When started, said fights are split between Field Phase and Duel Phase, basically mid range and short range, that you and the opponent can send each other into and out of. From there, there's various other things to consider: The Attack Triangle where one type of move beats another, the Synergy Gauge which gives you a special attack, and support Pokemon that give you a small boost though you have to pick between two for each round of the fight. With a large cast of characters, and much to do, there's little reason to turn one's nose up to this game. And if you don't like Nia, there are options to lower her interaction with you, just like in real life. You see you go into the option menu and-

QUICK, get rid of this...

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer (Wii)

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Not For:
- If you like games that take any effort at all.
- If you watched Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer
- Any Reindeer

What Runs it: A Wii and ten minutes you'll never get back.

Excuse me while I kick at a corpse.

Christmas is in danger and nothing is ready so you're needed to get it all set up for Santa to pull out of this production nosedive and save the holiday. And by that, I mean "Do you have a functioning wrist?" because all there is for this game is four minigames that merely checks to see if your moving more than anything. It's especially embarrassing with the fact that games like the Warriors exists, games that are licensed but are coming out so late to their source that there's no rush to release it. It's a movie older than most people on this website. Why is a game based off of the Rudolph stop motion movie some s**ty shovelware game? Because it's a cynical Christmas cash-in game. One that joins so many terrible Wii games made in its heyday and ultimately caused the console to lose a sizable chunk of its relevancy as a result because children and old people had the console ready to be milked. But who cares, Christmas is "saved".

Next time send Duke Nukem.

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#35

Post by Apiary Tazy » Mon Dec 16, 2019 2:05 am

Day 16: Ralph Adams Cram

Born December 18, 1863 in Hampton Falls, New Hampshire, Ralph was always an architect. It took one trip to Rome, specifically a Christmas Eve mass in 1887, to convert him towards being a high-church Anglician. He would become a key figure in groups like the Pewter Mugs and the Visionists, a group of artists inspired by the medieval style. His life was spent building churches and schools all over the eastern United States using a Gothic style that he felt was better than the Renaissance art styles that followed it. He would pass away in 1942, but his mark on modern architecture can still be felt today with some saying that he is criminally underappreciated and should be noted alongside many great American architects.

Let us begin this feast with...

Lego Racers

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Perfect For:
- When you're pretty much done with Mario Kart
- Someone with a lot of legos
- Traveller's Tales, the video game studio that makes Lego games.

What You Need: PC, Nintendo 64, Playstation 1, or Game Boy Color

I think I've said this before, but the best part of lists like these is that I can go one or two steps below the best of a genre and show a game with flaws that has some value to it still. Otherwise, I might as well put each Mario Kart game you're not playing right now, or just say "Dragon Ball Fighterz and Tekken 7 are good". I probably couldn't suggest really old games either. Geez, where would I be then? Well, I'm not gonna think about it. I'm just gonna enjoy some expensive building blocks and crash them into walls, as expected.

In the Lego Racer league, no one is faster than Rocket Racer. Though nowadays he just sits and waits for a worthy challenger, that doesn't slow down the races one bit and you are just one of the racers looking to push Rocket off his perch! There's a series of cups and each cup is comprised of four races. You have to at least place in the cup to proceed and you'll do so until you come to race the champ himself. As far as courses go, they have a bit of interactivity but it's mostly done through puzzles you have to learn in order to use shortcuts and the like. Like the games that inspired it, there are power-ups strewn on places of the track, but there is an additional trick in that you get a colored piece (Red, Blue, Green, or Yellow) then with each white piece you collect you enhance the power up itself. a missle can turn into a grappling hook, or a boost can change into a portal that zooms you down the track. It's got a surprising amount of depth but only as much as you put into it. Lego Racers can easily be broken in terms of difficulty but if you're willing to try it, you'll be surprised by how much there is to do in this game.

I'm just gonna get rid of this one, by the by...

Roadworks Simulator

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Not For:
- If In-depth simulator games are your cup of tea.
- Acutal Construction Workers
- Your favorite Twitch Streamer. Pick one.

What Runs It: A computer.

Oh, Emmanuel Christ... Look, so, simulator games are VERY popular in Europe and make a ton of money. So naturally, this not only leads to a bunch of those games being made, but also cheap terrible games to be made for the sole purpose of tapping into that market... And in the case of Roadworks Simulator, it's not even good enough for the bargain bin so much as for the bargain pit filled with bargain concrete.

So let's do roadwork! How? By accomplishing various tasks well enough that you pass onto the next one. When it works. It has a hard time doing that. It looks lazy, and controls rather poorly. There's a lack of polish all over the place as you can walk through barriers, or rather it's put in very strange places. There's a jackhammer that acts like there's nothing attached to it, but vehicles act as slowly as they do in real life to your personal anger. There's a lot to do in it, but none of it is really that fun, just tedious. Effort is THERE but at some point this unfinished mess of a game was just released and that was the end of it. It's not the only one of its kind either which is a real travesty. You're basically playing Three Door Monty with these games, you never know if you'll get delicious chocolate or a slap to the face. Luckily, I can tell you with utmost certainty that this one is bad so you can avoid it. As for the others, well... do you feel lucky?

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#36

Post by Apiary Tazy » Tue Dec 17, 2019 10:32 am

Day 17: Lazarus of Bethany

Yes, that Lazarus. Born in Bethany, near Jerusalem. His family was close to Jesus himself and they would take him in from time to time. Lazarus eventually fell into illness and Jesus's disciples were informed of his state. However, by the time Jesus arrives Lazarus has been dead for four days and was placed into his tomb. Jesus, though he had words for the family, wept for his friend. Then he goes to the tomb and has it opened, ignoring how his family felt. He tells Lazarus to "Come forth" and he proceeds to do so, alive and well. After Jesus was resurrected, Lazarus is said to have left Judea on threat to his life, and became the first bishop of Kition. He lived for thirty years afterwards, never smiling once due to what he had seen after death, aside from one time when he saw someone steal a pot, from which he said "The clay steals the clay".

Let us begin this feast with...

Spawn: In the Demon's Hand

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Perfect For:
-Satiating that craving for Dynasty Warriors
-Diehard Spawn fanatics
-Keith David, who voiced Spawn in the animated series.

What You Need: An Arcade cabinet, or a Dreamcast

You know what I need right now? A ridiculous and silly game with loosely held together rules. Sometimes, a stupid game is just what you need, one that has barely anything holding it does. Hell, that's the only way to possibly enjoy something like Marvel Nemesis... I feel bad for whoever had to actually put effort into that game. BUT. I have this other better licensed game based off of Todd MacFarline's most popular work. SPAWN.

Al Simmons was just a military man murdered by his superior and sent to hell. However, he then makes a deal with Malebolgia to become a hellspawn so he could see his wife. He finds that she married another and now it is his job as Spawn to bring the most evil people to hell for Malebolgia to use as he pleases. However, will Spawn actually follow his orders or will he turn against his master- It's the latter. So, In The Demon's Hand is an arena fighter where you kill grunts and big baddies and you die in a few seconds. There's an obvious power difference between characters but that doesn't mean one can't kill the other eventually or with the right strategy. The entire Spawn cast is here from demon to human to angel. You can have guns, swords, fists, anything at your disposal and life is cheap. In the story mode, death punishes you by taking eight seconds off your life in a game where most if not all bosses die in less than ten hits. You can't be mad at how goofy it all is. Get cleaved into pieces with a sword, then come back and kill whoever got you with a machine gun. It's a world with no nerfs anywhere and it is an experience you shouldn't miss out on.

Don't open the trash can. This is in it...

Neverdead

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Not For:
- If you wanted a game where two characters work together like A Rose in the Twilight.
- Remembering Quentin Tarantino films
- Demon Lords or those cursed by demon lords.

What Runs It: Playstation 3, Xbox 360

Who wants to be immortal anyway? Too much hard work. You're just going to watch everyone you care about die ten times over. You can just watch all the side stories in Lost Odyssey seven or so times and get the same experience really. Also, depending on the rules of immortality, you might get stuck somewhere forever and never be able to escape. It's not a good time. I mean, Neverdead proves that beyond a shadow of a doubt. It's also a bad game though so maybe it's not a good example.

After seeing a loved one get killed by Astaroth, Bryce is cursed to live forever with his failure. Five hundred years later, he gets hired alongside a woman to stop a demon invasion. So much fun, especially with the game's ideas standing there waiting to be used. As you're immortal, taking damage rends you to pieces that you need to roll over in order to collect again. You can also use your body to solve puzzles in hilarious ways, like roll your head into a small vent to reach something. In that way there are only two ways to get a fail state. First is by your partner dying and the second is if your head gets ate by certain monster types. Fair enough, right? Well, in practice... it doesn't work so much. Losing limbs is an exercise in frustration as control gets gimped almost immediately. That's a pretty big spoonful of vinegar to swallow when you realize most of the game is an escort mission to protect your partner, and the A.I's about as good as such games end up being in this era. As such, regardless of some neat design ideas, it really shouldn't be played. Keep it in the past, where we can just pretend it was good. Remember those good times? Just forget the bad.

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#37

Post by Apiary Tazy » Wed Dec 18, 2019 10:30 am

Day 18: Saint Sebastian

Born in 256, Sebastian joined the Roman army under Emperor Carinus to help martyrs. At the time, it was unknown that he was a Christian but a recorded incident recalls of how he converted several prisoners and their families. This included a woman who was mute but had her voice return to her after converting. Eventually, he was found out by Diocletian and bound to a stake. Then he was shot by several arrows. Miraculously, despite being made to become a pin cushion, he wasn't killed and Irene of Rome wound up nursing him back to health. Sebastian then confronted Diocletian at a staircase he would pass by and admonished him for his actions against Christians. For this, he was beaten to death then thrown into a sewer in 288. He was recovered by a woman who saw him in a vision and buried him in the catacombs at a cemetery in Calixtus which is where the Basilica of St. Sebastian sits today. Over the years, he became known as a protector against the plague.

Let us begin this feast with...

Valkyrie Profile

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Perfect For:
- If you've been interested in Suikoden, but also pushed away by the idea of finding a hundred plus characters
- Your aunt that enjoys reinterpretations of Norse Mythology.
- The ghost that haunts your bedroom.

What You Need: Playstation or Playstation Portable (Also iOS and Android but you play that at your own risk)

Where do you go when you die? Don't think about it. Stop thinking about it. Instead, let's talk about Norse Mythology. Odin, Thor, the Valkyries, Loki, Baldur, Frey, and more! The Norse Gods more or less glorify the acts of a warrior that fights and dies in battle. Or... at least it's assumed. Maybe we've been lied to this whole time? Don't think about it. Stop thinking about it.

You've died! And been reborn. You are a Valkyrie tasked by Odin to recruit warriors and face the coming of Ragnarok. That means going to the world of the living and dealing with the Vanir and other beings, hob nobbing with warriors and being there when people die so you can take them with you to Valhalla. It's an RPG from the Playstation era, so the standards are quite high here. Dungeons are 2d platforming stages with various techniques to traverse the area while the overworld is a 3d environment where you fly about pressing the start button to find things. You're here to find einherjar which can then be used in a turn based battle system. Each party member is assigned a button on the controller to use their attacks which is simple enough. Like many other RPGs, the protagonist herself is the one that needs to stay alive, however you do get a number of turns to revive her if she does fall over. With so much going for it, how can you not fall in love with this game? I guess there's many reasons like not liking the genre. But if that's the case, then there's no reason to like any of these games. I'm making myself obsolete! Oh no!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...

Real Horror Stories: Ultimate Edition

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Not For:
- Hidden Object Game Collectors.
- Anyone you know with a single horror movie or game on their shelf.
- That cursed image of the anxious emoji trying to grab you.

What Runs It: Can be found on your favorite piracy site. Or Steam I guess.

People have strong opinions on horror. I mean, on one hand, it's about reactions. If you jump then really is it that ineffective? On the other, some would say it's about the dread, or even the build up, or even the pay off! Am I talking about horror, comedy, or a country song? Or Nascar? ...Me? I think the best horror property is one that is good even if its scares don't work but I can see the appeal of scares. Though that requires actual scares [feel free to start the video from the beginning if you'd rather watch the whole game for yourself]

You've made a mistake and bought a game that was called Real Horror Stories. What follows is a series of jpegs you click all over in order to start some series of events. And by "events" I mean "another jpeg the author found while searching jump scares appears with a sound to make you spooged". It doesn't work at all. Maybe the first time it'll get you. The second? Sure. By the tenth time it happens, you'll quickly realize that this whole thing is a lazy attempt to throw scares at you with no other altercation for it. You're in no danger. There's maybe, ONE, inventive scare, but it's tampered by the game's unwillingness to be inventive. You'll get more value finding a haunted house and taunting the spooks inside. That's what I did. Oh, by the way- GOAT MAN! I'M ON YOUR BRIDGE, GOAT MAN! IT'S MY BRIDGE NOW, GOAT MAN.

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#38

Post by Shane » Wed Dec 18, 2019 7:59 pm

Valkyrie Profile sounds interesting, but I'm guessing they didn't sell any.
Competition is a good thing. It's a chance to crush people.

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#39

Post by CaptHayfever » Thu Dec 19, 2019 12:23 am

Valkyrie Profile: 3000/F/Tonsberg

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

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Re: 31 Days of Games You Might Be Interested or Disinterested in! 2019

#40

Post by Apiary Tazy » Thu Dec 19, 2019 9:49 am

Day 19: Lillian Trasher

Trasher was born in Jacksonville, Florida in the late 1800s then raised in Brunswick, Georgia as a Roman Catholic. After one term in a bible college, she spent three years at Faith Orphanage in North Carolina then failed to get work as a reporter. She was engaged to someone, but after hearing a missionary speak of their time in India, she broke the engagement and left for Egypt with her sister Jennie both having less than 100 dollars each. Shortly after arriving in Assiout, a incident involving a now dead woman and her malnourished baby, she defied her organization's rules and started up an orphanage, only leaving in 1919 as a result of British decree. From there, she joined the Assemblies of God, who form the biggest group of Pentecostals and worked at her orphanage until her death in 1961. Today, the Assemblies of God is responsible for the Lilian Trasher Orphanage with Lilian buried in the orphanage cemetery, remembered by the many kids she helped over the years.

Let us begin this feast with...

La-Mulana 1 and 2

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Perfect For:
- If you played a Metroidvania and thought "I want this game to kick my ass more".
- Avid fans of Indiana Jones.
- Masochists.

What You Need: A computer for both. Wii, or Vita for the 1st game's remake, PS4, Xbone, and Switch for the second. Though if you wait until March, you can get both on all the consoles that the second game is on right now!

History is out there! History is in fact being made right now! You wake up today? That's historical! You didn't wake up today? Still. Historical. That e-mail you made complaining about that guy who sells bad pottery. STILL. HISTORICAL. Everything is history, which means that nothing is history, but that's good because then we can have everything be history again. That doesn't make sense? Still historical. Like this game series.

La-Mulana is an ancient temple from which no one has been has been able to find much on without dying a horrible death. It's up to the Kosugis and their american ninja training to find the secrets hidden deep within what could be the birthplace of life itself. Inspired by MSX styled games, the La-Mulana franchise centers on retaining information found throughout the world for puzzles all over the various sections of the temple. It's metroid-esque in the sense that you'll get items necessary for progress with wall climbing, double jumps, new weapons, and computer programs gained from traversal. However, the main difference is that there's far more lateral thinking here, with punishments generally resulting in player death. You're not able to take too many hits, so it's all about finding the right time to do your action, and not so much just doing the action itself. It's hard, yes, but it's got a lot of heart in it as well. Don't be afraid. Everyone dies at lest four or five times in their life. Right?

Ew. Gross. Wash your hands of this...

Moses Prince of Egypt

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Not For:
- If you like unorthodox video games.
- Your mother who sings songs from Prince of Egypt sometimes.
- Caddicarus, unless you want to get shot.

What Runs It: A Playstation 1, though I'm sure a DVD player would do much the same.

The advent of CDs resulted in a lot of weird experimentation. 3D imagry, while impressive, was hard and not everyone could do it. Movie images were much easier to process onto now as it was pure data and not some form of film tape. Of course, given the early technology, there'd be some exper-... I can't.

The story retells how Moses saved his people from the Pharaoh. Not through gameplay, or anything, but through a half-hour cartoon done in some really bad 60's era animation style. Given that this was made by a foreign developer, the translation is direct and shoddy as well. But you can endure it, then enjoy the games within, like sliding puzzles and coloring... Okay, so I'm being a little disingenuous here because this isn't the only game like this. There's a bunch of other games on the Playstation 2 that are just like this one with the exact same quality. Sort of pulled one out of a hat randomly, but all of them follow the same idea in terms of mechanics. In the end the group behind these games closed its doors in 2009. Was that a good thing? Well, you don't see games like these anymore. Not unless you go to some website unattached from any storefront. Maybe you'll find a movie, sliding puzzle, and coloring book there. Or maybe just Plumbers Don't Wear Ties. That could just be a rom site...

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